Sometimes frail
Needing
Something sweet to cover up the bitter
Another kind word pasted over apprehension
Taking trips through sculpture gardens
Driving with wet face on
I wish I could be strong and confident all the time, but I am not. I get scared when the past haunts me and the future beckons me. I forget to be present because sometimes I am frail and needy. My comfort is that I am more confident than cowardly than I used to be. I would be lying if I couldn't admit my weaknesses. I would lying if I didn't admit how terrified I am of becoming a teacher. All my nightmares of returning to school are becoming reality. Making an effort to experience discomfort just seems like a paradox to me and yet that happens to be the road I am travellig on. How does someone return and move forward at the same time? Doesn't this somehow defy the laws of physics?
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1 comment:
Paloma, I'd be scared too. Returning to school is an awesome (as in large) decision. It will chaneg your life again, and probably make you feel like you've gone a little backwards, when your weekends are once again spent studying and writing papers, BUT it will go quick. I think becoming a teacher will be a wonderful AND professional thing to do. You've just got to take the plunge to commit to something new. When your done, it will hardly seem like anytime has passed.
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