Emmanuel Kant's Doors

The main contenders in my dream last night were doors. I swear I have never opened and closed so many doors within the course of one day. The opening, the closing, the opening, the closing... I was about to go mad. It was important that I open doors to get to my destination just as it was equally important to close them immediately afterwards. The reason being: I was taking care of a toddler. I had to constantly make sure that she was safe with me and not trapped in some prior room where anyone could get her. We were on our way to her mother and father. They were somewhere at the end of this maze of white hallways, rooms and doors waiting patiently for her. I was the caregiver and the guide alternating between hand-holding, carrying and twisting doorknobs right and left. I was haunted by the clicking doorknob sounds, echoing footsteps and screeching hinges. Everything was amplified and cold to the touch. My feet started to ache and so did the toddler's and yet we trudged forward knowing that there were wonderful people waiting for us that were dressed colorfully and smiling. They would finally shatter the monotony of white walls and the toddler could finally squeal with delight again rather than wearing her shoes thin with too much walking. She gurgled baby gibberish and looked at me for confirmations that what she was saying made all the sense in the world. I knodded my head as I staired at her wide-eyed. She would smile, but when she was not looking my brows were furrowed and I frowned. This journey was taking too long. I started questioning whether the parent's remained at the end of this path. I started questioning whether they existed at all. I started losing my grip and lingering too long at each door secretly wishing that we could turn back, go around the maze, and meet the parents directly at the exit. Then it occurred to me that I was the parent and I had chosen the most boring and barren path of all because stability was on the other side. Stability was the cheese. It would provide us sustenance after our long walk, so that we could live another day to meander through yet another maze or rather the same maze all over again.